Gethsemane

            Though they may not be my favorite single scripture, the most inspirational scriptures for me are those describing the Savior in the Garden of Gethsemane. These scriptures mean more to me, personally, than even the scriptures describing his death. During the Savior’s time in the Garden, I find my connection to Him. Here I see him as human, like me. Here I see him suffering like me, only more so. Here I see him alone, like I have often felt. Here I see him exercise great faith and devotion, something that I wish I could do. In the Garden, Christ is me and comes through it like I wish I could. 

            Though Christ knew that he had to feel everything that each of us would go through, all of the pain, suffering, sorrow, grief…everything, he did not wish to be alone. Upon arriving in the Garden, He asks his disciples to watch with him. As He suffers through the sins of the world, he is left alone. His friends are asleep when he needs them most. He wakes them and tells them to “watch and pray”. Again, He doesn’t want to be left alone. As Christ continues with the atonement, the apostles doze off. He wakes them a third time, again prompting them to “watch and pray” and, again they sleep while He suffers.

            During some of His most difficult times, Christ’s closest followers, those he trusted most, left him. He knows what it is to suffer alone. For that reason we are never alone. He knows what we are dealing with and how it feels to go it by oneself. He truly knows what is going on. He will always understand what each of us is going through.

            During the time that the disciples were asleep, Christ suffered, so much so that He sweat blood. This pain is immense. Whatever I am going through is going to be something that I can get through because I know that He got through it and so much more. I also know that it is okay to not want to go through it. Christ didn’t. He asked three times to “let this cup pass from [him]”. Even a perfect man who knew his purpose had feelings of his own. Feelings are not a sin. It’s okay to be upset by trials. It’s okay to want to not have to deal with them. It’s okay to be sad. It’s human.

            The challenge comes when we realize that having feelings can’t interfere with doing what we need to do. Christ didn’t want to suffer. He knew it would be hard, even excruciating. However, when faced with the knowledge that this was what needed to be done and that He was the only one who was able to do it, He followed the will of the Lord. He loves us and His Father. He wanted all of us to be happy and to be able to return to the Father. So we must respond.

            When we are faced with trials that we would rather not have, we should pray to have them lifted (if it be the will of the Lord) but we should also pray to have the strength to endure those trials that are our to endure. Not all of our trials will be lifted. How else would we grow? As Christ did, we must say “Nevertheless, thy will be done.” Often, these trials will be the hardest trials of our lives. Often they will hurt, but with the strength of the Lord we can overcome.

            I said that I can see myself in Christ in the garden. What I mean by this is that I see parallels with my life and His time there. I have had so many trials that I then would have wished away, most recently the loss of my husband. I have prayed so hard for those trials to be lifted, but they weren’t. I did, however, come to learn to ask for the strength to do what I needed to, regardless of whether the trial was lifted or not. From Christ in the Garden I have learned that it is okay to be sorrowful about the trials that I have but I also have to face that I have them and I have to keep moving forward with what I know is right. I have to have faith that I am doing something worthwhile. It’s taken me a while, but I know I am.

           I’m not always the most faithful in my trials. I’m not the first person to fall into prayer during trouble, but I wish I was. While I have found some lessons in these scriptures, I still need to use them. I need to practice the faith that Christ showed. I need to follow the example that He set for me in my trials. That’s the only way that I can make it through.

That’s the only way that you can make it through.